quarta-feira, 1 de junho de 2011

My genitals

One thing that never really bothers me is my genitals.I never felt "disgust" of it and it was not my main problem really.If I could choose to be born with a vagina I would love it,but since it didn't happened,I will have to do the surgery.I never did one and I have plenty of time to think about it.There are risks,about the functionality and the appearance of the vagina,and I will not be happy if it happened and I will not forgive myself for making that choice(same with face surgery,and I really don't think that I need it much).
So,it is something that is not in the top of my list to do about transition(first I need to come out first,then therapy and then hormones).
I don't think that using your penis or not wanting to have surgery don't make you less transwoman,it just part of you and you have the choice of keeping it or not.If it work for you,people should feel happy for you,not hate you.

4 comentários:

  1. I identify entirely with what you say here. I feel almost the same about it. I never liked my bits either, but it wasn't the utter disgust that other girls say they felt about their male genitalia. It was more like sadness that it isn't what it should have been.
    I honestly don't know if I'll ever get to the point of getting SRS or not (I hope I do, but as you say there are other arguably more important things that come first).

    Its a bit sad, nonetheless, when some trans girls feel forced to get the surgery as a "validation" or proof that they are "real women". It's dumb to think like that but many do (even within the trans community). I hope that changes with time (I want to believe that we're moving in the right direction! ^^).

    I wish you luck with your coming out (hopefully it will take place soon... I'm anxiously awaiting to hear something about that when I come to read your blog).
    And dunno... just smile: you're so young! :)

    Beijos da Argentina! ;)


  2. Yeas,at first when I didn't knew much about transition,the main thing in my head was getting the surgery in my genitals,but as I started to know more about other more important parts of transition and about the risks of doing the surgery,it became really not so important to me.
    Yes I'm hoping to come out soon,my family shows that is worried(sometimes they say that I'm to lonely and sad)and they are not super religious(my mother is catholic but far from fanatical and my dad never went to the church when my brother and I were in first communion(it was the only part of my live that we were going to the church regularly XD)but she sometimes says that don't think that being gay is natural,but respect others,and always loved me very much,and I think that there are going to be the shock and denying,but I think that there is a chance of accepting^^

  3. You certainly won't need FFS if you start taking hormones at such a young age. Being SO young is a huge advantage in many ways. It really makes me happy (and envious!) when I see/read about someone your age already transitioning or seriously thinking about it.
    Back when I was 15 I didn't even have internet access at home to research about our "gender issues" (and I didn't even know what to look for, to be honest). And then, when I finally did start reading blogs, watching videos, participating in forums about this I thought to myself (at age 17 or so) "I'm already past puberty so it's more or less the same if I transition now or in 5 years or so." So I decided to wait, thinking that it would be easier later, and I wouldn't be in such deep trouble if my parents didn't accept me. But in hindsight it was a HUGE mistake. Since I was 17 my body changed quite a lot (although puberty was already behind me I didn't have quite the bone structure that I have today, nor this terribly hirsute body and many things got worse... not to mention all the experiences I missed having as a girl). So last year (being 21) i decided to finally do something about it and came out to my parents (who still deny it and threaten me that they'll throw me out if I turn into "a freak" and such nice things), got to see a therapist and to "get hold" of hormones (so far, on my own). But well, I hope you don't follow my path and don't decide to postpone anything. I know we're all aware that "the younger the better". But sometimes we underestimate the difference a few years can actually make and end up convincing ourselves to wait "just a bit more" (I've read many stories like that, besides mine). And it's not for the better: one ends up regretting it bitterly. :(

    Lastly, the "risks" of surgery when speaking of SRS aren't so prevalent nowadays. I mean, the vast majority of the girls who get it end up with fully functional and reasonably good-looking results, even when the process does involve some potential pitfalls. These things used to be much more dangerous and "uncertain" some time ago but the landscape is thankfully highly encouraging today. :)

    Sorry that I post such long comments here. But I feel compelled to do so, because I can't help to think of the situation I was in at your age and try to say something or share it with you or other "young transitioners". I hope you'll also get more people to comment, as it's encouraging.

    Good luck with everything.

    Take care, gal! :)

  4. I like long comments,it shows that you like my blog^^
    I kinda now the feeling because sometimes I wish I could start before puberty,but I still now that the effects will be good even at 15,because there are still new puberty effects going on(more hair in my body and little in the face if compared to last year)
    Even with all the lack of courage I think that I will do it this year^^
    Bye,thanks for commenting